Talk about stepping on the gas peddle. I went from doing four part time jobs for about 30 hours a week to one full time, contract job for 40 hours a week. As it turns out, 10 hours makes a huge difference. So instead of having the newsletter at the beginning of the month, we’re doing it
at the end as a double whammy March and February Newsletter.
So, How am I doing?
On paper, I am doing great. My dreams are coming true, I’m making the most I’ve ever made, and I’m branching out in emotionally healthy ways. However, I am exhausted most days and I attribute this to overall weariness after graduating college. A Pandemic and the death of a father have been draining experiences to say the least. I’m hoping once I get back into my healthy habits, I can ease the burden a bit. However, even knowing I have the tools at my disposal, I know the only way my life is going to excel is by doing something extraordinary.
A Year of Mental Health
Last year was kind on my mental health, I took a break to slow things down and learned about stoicism along the way. This year, I’m going to be digging a little deeper and in May, I have most (if not all the articles) for Mental Health Awareness Month planned. One will cover the male malaise and the other will cover imperfection. Ideally, I’ll talk more about my craniosynostosis but only time will tell. And I’m going to take a deep dive of what keeps pulling me into my past. The last couple weeks have proven that my mental health isn’t quite where I want it to be and that’s ok. I have a lot of stressors right now and I’m only human.
The Revival of Adventure
If you’ve been waiting for more travel related articles, it has finally come. With my trip to New Zealand, I will have plenty to talk about but before then, I’m hoping to write a bit more about my goals for this year. I am an avid runner (or was) and with a half marathon, I can finally prove I still have the discipline to face down my toughest challenges head on. And I want to document this journey, so this year may well be a hodgepodge of all that will be done.
So, this year is a little chaotic. I am taking more time for myself, which is good but it also means a bit more of going with the flow. So February I missed the newsletter deadline and while I had most of it written, I simply didn’t hit publish. The important article was my new year post, which I did manage to accomplish (although not in January). This month should be much better than last month as I finally settle into my new role and have a bit more room to breathe.
Life getting an update
I’m long overdue for a bit of a reboot. It’s a year about making the extra effort count and letting the pieces fall in place. It’s a year about having faith and it’s a year where I can be truly free. Each paycheck is going towards my savings and with it, a guarantee that I will be debt free before I turn 30. The next focus is the money I do make and a focus on adaptability. The future job markets will require flexibility and I’m hoping to finally get established this upcoming year.
I’m at a point in my life where it can really go either way. I’ve developed a lot of healthy habits towards dating and am working on feeling less urgency to settle down. My life is not really conducive to settling down right now. No dating apps but dating coaches I’m open to. Friends setting me up and meeting people in person? Yes please. It’s a chaotic process and my time is better spent other places. But also understand now that I’m older that it may be a necessary one. I have great relationships and enjoy my own company (most days) but there is still an element missing and perhaps it is time I prioritize that element just as much as everything else.
Keep on keeping on
So I have to remember to stay on the path, specifically, my path. I tend to overextend and suffer for it. This year is about knowing my goals and following through. And by knowing my goals, I mean really knowing them. Knowing why I’m doing something and having it lead to a better life. I’m tired of spinning my wheels, waiting on others, and being at the mercy of the world. I have not felt like I’ve had control over my life since graduation. And while in freefall, I’ve been just barely able to hang on. That is the truth. My purpose in this world has been lost in the chaos and that’s what worries me the most. That I am adrift without an anchor. It is so hard to fight back the fear and not let it crush me. So here’s to hoping.
I’m going to try to get out another article, thinking about writing one on dating apps. It’s going to be pretty low key as I keep my head to the grindstone and work on making sure everything is in place for later this year. As always, thanks for reading!